It’s December 22, 2012 and your still alive. The Mayan Calendar has started a brand new long count. We’ve heard all the scenarios from plausible to absolutely ridiculous from solar flares, asteroids, comets, mega earthquakes, giant tidal waves, pole shifts, nuclear war, and a zombie apocalypse. Even Planet X aka Nibiru was supposed to show up, but it didn’t…again. The scenarios even went as far as someone saying that Nostradamus predicted that the world would end due to Psy reaching one billion hits on YouTube for his “Gangnam Style” song. That’s actually pretty funny, but honestly speaking, this song needs to die…like now.

Obviously the world didn’t end. December 21, 2012 was just another day. A Friday. One more day closer to Christmas. Did you buy all your Christmas presents, or did you waste it on 2012 survival gear, canned food, useless trinkets, or an underground bunker hoping that all hell would break loose? If you did the latter then my friend the joke was on you. How stupid do you feel right now after getting all worked up over nothing?

Just like Y2K, the dreaded Mayan Apocalypse was nothing but a hoax. A bunch of hype orchestrated by the History Channel, Discovery Channel, Coast to Coast AM, false prophets, doomsayers on YouTube, and a bunch of whacko “scientists” that supposedly talked to aliens. In other worlds, a bunch of weirdos with no life, a possible death wish, and a brilliant marketing strategy all to get your money. These people all seriously claimed, with scientific evidence, that the Earth as we know it was coming to a cataclysmic end. They also wanted to cash in on the feeble minded by scaring you, and making you believe in a bunch of bullshit that just wasn’t there.

Now as some of you emerge from your underground shelters expecting hellfire and brimstone, planes falling from the sky, nuclear fallout, alien invasion, or hordes of zombies here’s a news flash. All that shit didn’t happen. Instead all your going to find is a bunch of people packing into their local Wal-Marts buying those last minute Christmas gifts just so that they can save face in front of their families, because they thought the world was going to end. Yes, all you weirdos will find yourself in good company as you look for some cheap gifts to wrap up along with all that unneeded survival gear. Yeah I’d love to see the look on little Johnny’s face on Christmas morning where instead of a brand new toy he unwraps a gift containing a 2012 survival guide and a can of Spam.

And where are the doomsayers you ask. Well they’re in hiding right now. I’m sure they’ll emerge from their basements in the next few days with a brand new date based on some new quantum mathematic equation and some bullshit theory to back it up. Some will even say their calculations were slightly off. All we’re going to say is “seriously man, the whole Mayan apocalypse thing was bullshit so kiss my ass.” Only the good Lord upstairs knows when the world will end and he’s not going to tell anyone when it will happen so don’t believe what you see on TV or on the internet.

In closing, keep in mind that the Mayans never predicted the end of the world. If they were able to predict Earth’s end then why couldn’t they predict when their civilization was conquered by the Spanish Conquistadors? Just something to think about.

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